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Denial vs Avoidance

Marie Price
by Marie Price on 21/03/14 18:00

On 27th December 2012 I received 3 bottles on wine in a lovely wooden box as a present from my wife's Aunt and Uncle.

At the time I was training for the 24 hour bike ride and the Outlaw Half Triathlon (or beginning to start training) and I took a permanent black marker and wrote on the outside of the box "Do not open until March 2014".

Inside the box I also put 2 bars of chocolate my daughter had bought for me, locked the box and put it on my kitchen floor.

My intention was to symbolically lock away the wine and lock away the chocolate so that I didn't touch it again and to see what effect this would have on me overall and whether it would improve me physically and mentally.

I lasted until Marlow on the 24 hour bike ride before I ate chocolate (I had drunk alcohol before then)

In that 6 months though I had been incredibly disciplined in my ability to say no. Following the 24 hour bike ride I went back onto the chocolate like an addict, having only a few days at a time when I didn't eat chocolate. Continually trying to avoid it, not go near the cupboard in the kitchen where it might be or stay out of shops where I could see it. I never made it to 2014.

The answer for me is denial, not avoidance. The answer for me is to develop the strength to be able to say 'No' in the face of the things I don't want to do, not to avoid where they are.

Some years ago I decided to avoid going out with my best friends because I drank too much and got in a mess. Afterwards people would laugh at me because I was always the one that got into bother whereas they were able to stop. Since then I have developed the ability to just deny myself. So I get the chance to see my friends but don't get into problems from drinking too much. The same applies to chocolate and work. All of these addictions are the same.

For me, it is about being able to deny not being able to avoid.

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Marie Price
Written by Marie Price
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