For various reasons I'm struggling to train at the moment.
I'm hovering around 13 stone and hovering around 40 on my CTL score (that's a chronic training load score on a programme called TrainingPeaks which is completely irrelevant but which I use as a self-esteem score).
I'll stress about this, or at least I'll worry about it or be down on myself and think that I'm not good enough and then I present pictures on the consultation masterclass of what I looked like when I was 18 stone.
I'm a lot better than when I was 18 stone, and I'm a little bit worse than I was when I was 12.
I'm a lot better than when my CTL score was 7 during my knee injury, and I'm a lot worse than when it was 89 when I did my Outlaw.
I get to choose how I rate myself against these scores or if I even rate myself at all.
I need to choose better, because the story is that I'm trying my best, and that should be enough of a story without having to count in any other way.
Blog Post Number - 3386
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