So, be careful because this is almost certainly going to work out as a humble brag.
This week was the first week of training in a 38 week plan to do something next summer which is beyond me and too difficult and too hard.
These are the greatest joys in my life almost, the challenges that seem outside of my grasp.
And so, I had meetings with my coach Simon who has looked after me for years and discussions with friends and potential team mates for the stuff we might do (more about them later) and then we started on Monday morning, early on in the shed riding my bike.
I’ve actually cheated a little bit by getting a few sessions in before that but it got to 6.25am on the Friday (That’s today) and I was 15 minutes in to a 85 minute session on the bike.
It’s funny how the switch trips and the motivation arrives.
I had toast last night later on, it’s the first thing outside of my eating plan that I’ve had for 6 days and it’s only because I’m in such a calorie deficit now.
I woke up at 5.30am this morning because, in my mind, I had a session and I had to start it before 6.15am.
The session that I do on a Monday and a Friday I’ve nicknamed ‘the vomit session’ and todays is longer so it’s the ‘extended vomit session’ and so, at 6.10am as I pushed the peddle round for the first time on the Watt Bike in the shed in the dark, just trying to finish the session.
By 6.25am I’ve found it, like catching a cloud.
There is my mojo and the thing that lets me imagine what it will be like in 38 weeks time and the joy that I’ll feel when I cross the finish line if I make it.
I can try to tell myself this narrative time after time, month after month and it seems like I almost have no control about when it starts and when it comes.
No doubt I’ll be writing something next week about how I fell off the wagon and went to the co-op and bought a massive bag of salt and vinegar crisps and 200g of Cadburys caramel (my chosen poison for my form of alcoholism) but from now until then I’m going to try and revile in the fact that my motivational switch has flicked and I am now seeking out opportunities to push myself to that place which is beyond me.
Blog Post Number - 2887
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